My story Who am I? And how can I support you? I have always been one that was fascinated by the human condition, being a helpful ear and supportive friend. Much of my young life was taken up on dreams of being seen and of mattering greatly. Noticing that being the middle child of six I had a sense of being lost or a bit invisible to the needs of my parents, who were entrepreneurs, artists, environmental activists and always taking in a fellow human who needed a little extra support, generosity was highly valued. The death of my father in 2008 by suicide, was the catalyst for my work in psychology, I spent many years learning how to best be with my feelings around his death, I wish someone had told me then, what I know now. Things that were not spoken of in my family were: My mothers deep struggle with self loathing as a result of the trauma she undertook at the hands of her father, it was something she shut away. Her brothers alcohol addiction, making myself to this day estranged from him and an on going fear of my maternal grandfather by all five of my siblings, at the time unaware of the sexual abuse our mother had gone through. My journey of moving through the pain of my family has helped me to know myself, to have deep compassion for the parts of me that feel fear, or anxiety that struggle with self love and body shame. To know that what I carry has come down from layers of pain through the family. To look at it, move through it, make peace with the past, not to forget but to grow beyond it’s limitations. From my Nordic roots, I grew up with the love of Fairies, Gnomes and a belief of there being a very real world just beyond our reach. I believe the dark is what truly shows us the light. In my late teens I became part of a spiritual healing group, that later I came to understand was a cult, unfortunately by that time much damage had already been done. Through it I learned rich lessons which have become key in my practice.
Never allow another to ordain the direction of our life, for myself having gone through that process I always advocate for the inherent wisdom of each human to know what is best for them. My role as counselor is simply to assist them in tapping into and reaching that part of themselves, to support them in trusting their inner knowing. Our ability to be with death in society is quite limited, there is a lack of understanding and an unwillingness to look at those feelings. I am in awe of where life has brought me, I feel deep gratitude for my clients and to this work. Taking the steps to know oneself deeply allows us to know others on another level, as I have grown so has the richness of my life. We will all have to walk up to the death of someone, and to the death of ourselves, our whole life we are moving towards it, there is an avoidance of it, as if in not facing it, somehow it cannot come to pass. The gift in facing it at a younger age is it makes you aware of the preciousness of the time you have. In helping ourselves we help others, in helping others we help ourselves, we are as much a mirror of those we loved as we are a glass of our own. Sincerely Maja Futrell-Frühling
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